34 things I've learnt in 34 years
It's a yearly tradition at this point
I turn 34 in a few days and a lot of change is imminent. I’m currently sat in the other 23 way out west, the scent of lilies filling the room. All being well, I’ll be back here for good very soon. At the time of writing, it’s exactly 6 years since I moved into my little London flat, and exactly 8 years since I moved into my little shed. Strange how circular time can be!
Stainless steel pans are incredible if you know how to use them correctly: heat them up without any oil and it’s only ready to use when you sprinkle water and it fully beads (as opposed to evaporates). Then you can turn the heat down a little, add your oil or butter then start cooking. This will make your pan totally non-stick!
You can totally cut your own fringe using TikTok tutorials but it’s not going to look as good as going to a hairdresser. No matter how many times you watch the video.
Saying no doesn’t make you a terrible person; saying yes when you know you’re going to cancel anyway doesn’t either but it’s definitely frowned upon.
Nothing will feel better (city edition) than a fresh Lime bike on your way to meet your girlfriends at a wine bar at 8pm.
Nothing will feel better (coastal edition) than lying in a secluded corner of the seawall before sunset, swimming in your underwear then sharing pizza and a beer shortly afterwards.
You really don’t need more than half a tablespoon of table salt when making a chicken broth.
Deli containers and coloured tape makes sauce/dressing/marinade/leftovers prep feel so good.
Rewatching the final season of Girls when you are about to leave the city you’ve lived in for 6 years is extremely poignant.
Running does actually make you feel good, especially when you design a 30 minute playlist to ebb and flow with movements and you finish on Since U Been Gone.
It’s not as hard as you think it is to talk to people in a group setting.
The best way to roast a chicken mid-week is to spatchcock it, salt it, slather it in a paste of anchovy, garlic, rosemary, lemon zest and olive oil, roast it over sliced new potatoes and serve it with the simplest salad.
You’re objectively not the worst person in the world; but there’s always room to be more kind to others and yourself.
Be grateful for the cloudy days in summer - that’s when you get all your work done.
If the first thought that comes into your head when you look in the mirror is negative, step away. Nothing good comes from hating your reflection for ten solid minutes.
Sunday night meal prep could just be 3-4 sauces and dressings to elevate your food that week: salsa verdes, green goddess dips, lime miso vin, charred lemon anything.
There’s a fine line between being picky and being close-minded. Perfection isn’t instantaneous.
Water your plants as soon as you think about it. Same goes for most things, to be honest.
Lust is quick and loud. Love is slow and quiet.
The best meals are 40% about the food and 60% about the people you’re with.
Eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full. It’s wild that it’s taken 34 years for me to understand that, and I still get it wrong sometimes.
When a guy tells you he felt no spark, it doesn’t mean you’re not spark-worthy. Take it as a sign that you probably didn’t either.
Spiralling is sometimes necessary but only up to a certain point: give it half an hour and then do the thing that snaps you out (jumping in cold water usually does the trick).
You don’t have to be able to cook everything. If you’re great at salads, hone that skill! Be the one who brings a banging salad to the table.
Buy a bikini that actually suits your body type. Otherwise you’ll spend all your time obsessing over pictures of yourself thinking you’re a monster, when actually you’re wearing a bikini top designed for someone with a chest half your size.
It’s ok to not reply to every WhatsApp message within the first five minutes.
The amount of likes you get on a Substack post doesn’t make your writing any more or less poignant. Your writing matters whether one person gets something from it (and that one person could be you) or 100 people do.
"Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell." - Edward Abbey
You probably don’t need another pair of jeans unless they look VERY good on you.
Working out is much more fun if you do it with your friends and grab coffee with them afterwards.
The story in your head doesn’t always match up to the stories in other people’s heads.
If you have rice, soy sauce and sesame oil, you have a meal.
Always use the 1:1.1 ration of rice to water – or buy Edition 01 of Kettle Objects!!
Ask the question: are you hungry or are you thirsty?
Your next move is the best move.
happy birthday darling babe! we'll celebrate together soon :)
turning 34 this summer and agree with all 34!